Reframing

Does parenting a child with special needs sometimes feel like a test? I’ll just pretend I can hear your exasperated “YESSSSS!”

So, what if we could reframe that feeling of pressure and think about it more like a practice test.  Like the Emergency Broadcast System, “Remain calm. This is only a test. In the event of a real emergency, instructions will follow.”

Every experience we have while raising our kids is practice for them and for us. No one gets a perfect parenting score.  We grow and learn as we are parenting our little ones. They learn from each choice we make (good or bad) and so do we.

You are going to have zillions of choices to make as a parent. Frame this in your thinking as chances to get better and better at your decision-making. It takes some of the pressure off when you think of it as just one of so many choices.

It won’t work for every situation, but at times, you may be able to give yourself the ‘Remain calm. This is only a test’ speech. Unfortunately, even in an actual emergency, instructions will not follow.  

You’ll need to make many decisions on the fly and they won’t all be winners.  All the more reason to take away any extra pressure whenever possible.